Drama...and dating...a lively mix :)

Recycling....

As I perused the free personals this morning I noticed how I don't see any 'new' men on there. I mean, I recognize nearly every single man who is within 50 miles of my zip code. Not that I know them personally, but I have seen their pictures for a while. Some of those pictures I have seen for over a year - ok years. It's weird that I have finally reached the end of the available men on the free personals in my town. Now what? Is it time to move?

Sort of a funny story.....

A couple years ago, when there were still men I didn't recognize on the free personals, I got a letter from this guy I will call 'Steve'. His little, thumbnail sized photo didn't exactly move me, but he seemed nice enough. He wrote more than 'Hey hottie, hit me up", which always wins a man at least two points. After a couple letters I added him to my Facebook page so he could check out my artwork, etc. I had just been let go from my job, it was summer, I had nothing to do, I was making new friends. A day or so later, we met up for coffee.

As soon as I saw 'Steve' I knew I wasn't that interested. Not that he was ugly, but his look just wasn't appealing to me. I'm Jewish, I like dark men. What can I say? He was very German looking, super blue eyes. Not my type. His demeanor was very sluggish (for lack of a better word), he had down sloping shoulders, and his handshake was weak. But, the biggy was that he was wearing a Pentagram ring. That really turned me off. More than it being a 'Pagan' thing, it just seemed stupid to me. *No offense to all of you who wear Pentagram symbols, it would be no different it he had long hair and wore a White Snake shirt - it's not my thing* Oh.... *No offense to those of you who have long hair and wear White Snake shirts either! :) * We had our coffee and some light conversation, then parted ways. He wrote me later and said he had fun, asked me out again. I told him I wasn't feeling a 'spark' and even though he seemed nice, I really didn't want to go out again. Within a few days I removed him from my Facebook. I mean, what was the point of having his as a 'friend' if we weren't really friends, aye?

Nearly two years later, this last July, I got a note on Facebook from a friend of mine whom I had just reconciled with after a 'friend breakup' that lasted for over a year. She stopped talking to me when I lost my job, around the time 'Steve' wrote me on the free personals. Her note said that 'Steve' was her ex - the ex she used to talk to me about ALLLLLLL the time since we met - and he told her that we went to coffee a couple years earlier. At first I had no idea who she was talking about. 'Steve' is a common name. I have met many men from the online personals for coffee. Then she said that he was on my Facebook as a friend too. I really had to put my thinking cap on for that one. Then it hit me. 'Steve' was the guy wearing the Pentagram ring! I cracked up - out loud. I wrote her back and explained the whole situation and that I had NO IDEA that the 'Steve' I had an innocent coffee with was HER 'Steve'. How ironic. Right? What a small world. When I didn't get a response to my letter of explaination, I sent a second note to my friend telling her that I valued our friendship and I hoped that she knew I wouldn't have ever gone to coffee with 'Steve' had I known who he was. She had never shown me a picture of him in all the time she talked about him. I had no idea what his last name was. His first name is a common name.

I never heard from her again. She remained a 'friend' on Facebook, but never posted anything on my page or replied to anything I posted on hers. Earlier this month, it was her birthday and I wished her a Happy Birthday only to get a curt 'Thank you' in response. Her other Birthday wishes were replied to with much more loving and friendly words of gratitude, which seemed to single me out as a 'jerk'. So, I sent her a note and said I was going to remove her from my 'friend' list so she didn't have to do it to me. It was pretty apparent that our friendship was basically over in her eyes and I wanted to let her off the hook. She didn't respond to that letter or action either.

I'm not really all that sad about it to be honest. Had the shoe been on the other foot, I would have laughed it off. For whatever reason, everything she knew about me for the past 6 years wasn't even taken into consideration - I went to coffee with her ex.

But, it made me think, if the pool of single men in this town has narrowed down to a puddle - aren't we all going to meet at least one ex of a friend eventually? It seems inevitable.

Maybe that isn't such a funny story after all....